


Ours. Gone.

by LittleSweetCheeks



Series: Don't Call Me.... [4]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Gen, Grief, Infant Loss, Support
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2020-11-22 19:28:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20879468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSweetCheeks/pseuds/LittleSweetCheeks
Summary: When their world crumbles, Garcia is there to help.





	Ours. Gone.

Penelope tottered toward her office, balancing files and her dinner as she tapped the code that would unlock the door. The team had left two hours ago for the small town of Parkersburg, West Virginia where a child had gone missing on her way home from school. The locals had immediately called in for help, citing the number of sex offenders in the general area whose targets were similar in type to the girl. Garcia had taken advantage of their hour flight to track down some dinner.

She’d been on the job now four weeks and the normal stuff was getting easier, but the cases still made her struggle. When her phone rang on the desk, Penelope pulled on her headset and pressed connect. “What can I find for you?” She asked, assuming it was one of the team.

“Penelope? It’s me.” A soft voice spoke back.

“Haley?” She was confused, Hotch had said he would call his wife to tell her they were leaving on the ride to the jet.

“Something’s wrong.”

“What?” She glanced at her screens, unsure what else to say. “What do you mean, something’s wrong?”

“I need Aaron to come home.” Garcia could hear that the other woman was keeping her voice even, controlled. “I tried to call him just now, but he didn’t pick up.”

“They landed a little bit ago in West Virginia, he’s probably in a briefing at the moment. Haley, what’s going on? Where are you?”

“I’m at home.” Her voice caught. “Bleeding.”

It took a second for the pieces to fall into place and then Penelope was up out of her seat, trading her headset for her phone as she grabbed her purse. “I’m coming to you, I’ll be there as fast as I can.” Disconnecting the call, Garcia pressed the next button on her phone while rushing through the building.

“Hotchner.” Hotch answered.

“Find a car or something and start driving.” Garcia abruptly demanded.

Confused by the demand, Aaron frowned. “Why?”

“Haley called.”

“She tried to call me a minute ago. What’s going on?”

“She’s bleeding, Aaron. I’m on my way to take her to the hospital.” She dumped her things in her back seat and climbed in, putting the car in gear. “We’ll see you at the hospital.”

==

Aaron was frantic. It had already been nearing dark when he’d gotten the call, it would be close to midnight by the time he arrived at his destination. In the darkness, he pressed the pedal of the SUV he’d managed to rent just a little bit harder, sending up a prayer that he wouldn’t end up in a wreck or pulled over.

His mind played over and over the missed call that had come in while he was talking with the men leading the search. He’d missed calls from Haley before, he always called her back as soon as he had a chance. It had never been a big deal. He swore to himself that he would never miss another call from her again.

As he finally reached the city limits of DC, the bright streetlights a welcome beacon after hours of dark highways, his mind was already drafting requests for time off to take care of Haley. She needed him now more than the job did.

Finding a parking spot in the hospital’s garage, Aaron rushed to find an elevator down to the Emergency Department. After rounding several corners and jogging what felt like the entire perimeter of the hospital, he found the main lobby of the ER. He rushed to the counter. “Excuse me, my wife was brought in a few hours ago?”

“Name?” The nurse didn’t even look up.

“Haley Hotchner.” He watched anxiously as she typed.

“She’s still in the ER. Go through the door right there and follow the blue line to the right, after the second corner look for room one forty-five.” She pressed a button under the desk that made the locks on the door to the side of the desk click open.

“Thank you.” Aaron took off at a more respectable, but no less urgent, pace. When he found room one forty-five, the room was silent as he peered in. Haley was sitting on the bed, tears tracking down her face, as Garcia held her close. Stepping into the room, he took a breath. “I’m here.”

Both women looked up at him, eyes red, as Haley opened her mouth to speak. When nothing would come out, she drew a ragged breath and the crying started anew. Penelope pulled her close again, holding her tight as she met her boss’s eyes over Haley’s head, shaking her head in answer to the unasked question.

==

Aaron drove Haley home; the car was silent as he maneuvered carefully through the city. His heart ached at their loss and he was unsure how to start the conversation without upsetting her further. In the end, he decided to remain quiet. Once they got home, he helped her carefully in and up to bed, tucking her in tight before stepping back out into the hall.

With the bedroom door shut, Aaron looked around the small hall, eyes landing on the door at the end. The door that all of their hopes and dreams had lay behind. Back to the wall, Aaron sank to the floor across from that door and let his head fall into his hands as he wept, his whole body shaking with the near-silent sobs.

==

Aaron spent the next week silently waiting on Haley hand and foot, barely letting her leave the bedroom in case she overdid it. He didn’t want to bring up what they lost in case she broke down again and he didn’t want to talk about how devastated he was as well in case Haley thought he was trying to downplay her grief. So, like a ghost, he moved from room to room, bringing her food and drink and anything else she could possibly want, keeping his own emotions locked away. Then at night, once he knew she was asleep, he returned to his spot in the hall and cried over the child they wouldn’t have.

On the eighth day, Penelope stopped by unexpectedly with bags of groceries, insisting she was more than capable of putting them away while Hotch tended to his wife. As she worked, she listened. To the silence, to the soft tears of her friend, to the depression that was clouding the closed-up house. Eventually, she crept upstairs and found the pair existing in the same place, but not really together. Taking a deep breath, she shooed Hotch out of the room and out of the house for an hour before she returned to her friend’s side. “How are you holding up?”

“It hurts.” Haley chewed her lip. “I have no idea what Aaron’s thinking, he has barely said a word to me all week. I want my husband, but instead I just have this man made of stone. He holds it all in like his emotions are a big secret.”

“Aw, Sweetie. I’m sure he’s just as upset as you are, he just doesn’t want you to worry about him too.”

“Do you… Would you stay tonight? I’m not sure I can handle another evening of the silence.”

“Sure, whatever you want.” Later that evening, after Haley had drifted off to sleep, Garcia went searching for where Hotch had gotten himself off to after their silent dinner. She found him in the hall, on the floor with his head on his arms. When he looked up at her, eyes red and bloodshot from the night’s round of crying, her heart broke. Kneeling down, she pulled him close like she had Haley, supporting him as he wore himself out. When he quieted, she finally spoke. “You have to talk to Haley.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“You could start with telling her you sit here, staring at that room, crying. Just talk to her, it doesn’t have to be in a nice neat order, it just has to be said.”

After a moment, he pulled back upright and studied her. “How did you get to be so good at knowing what to say?”

Garcia shrugged.

“Okay. I’ll talk to her.” He stood, glancing at the door before turning toward the master bedroom. “Thank you for coming today. You don’t have to stay.”

“You’re welcome and I told Haley I’d stay, so you’re stuck with me till morning. Go to her. And don’t rush to get up in the morning, I’ll take care of breakfast.”

==

Haley was surprised when she rolled over just as the sun was coming up and Aaron was under the covers beside her just watching her in the dim morning light. “Hey, Sweetheart. Good morning.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ve missed having you in here beside me.”

“I’m sorry.” He looked away.

“It’s okay, Aaron. How are you doing?”

“Fine.” He responded immediately, but then remembered Garcia’s words. “Devastated, angry. I’m sorry if I’ve been distant.” His eyes found hers again. “Every night after you were asleep, I’ve sat in the hall, staring at the door of the nursery, and cried for the baby we couldn’t have.”

“Oh, Sweetie.” Haley pushed to a seated position so she could pull him into a hug. “I know you’re upset too, I just wished you would show it to me so we could share it.”

“I didn’t want you to get more upset. For me it was still mostly just an idea but you…you lost a baby. It was a part of you.”

Tears filled her eyes. “Honey… _We_ lost a baby. Both of us. It was part of you too.” She kissed along his hairline. “Just promise to be honest with me about your feelings, okay?”

“Okay.”


End file.
